Doctor Smoke - The Witching Hour (2014)

I might not cover it much on these pages, but stoner/doom metal and rock is something I spin often, almost as my own personal alternative to the repetitive hard/heavy rock radio stuff that holds little interest for me after the first few times I heard it. You'll often as not find me blasting some Corrosion of Conformity, Monster Magnet, Queens of the Stone Age and their ilk, and Doctor Smoke is a band that figures into that particular spectrum. Super catchy style reliant heavily on the grooving Sabbath style riffs but then making it their own, with more melody and harmony present. I am in turns reminded me of a 'cleaner' Uncle Acid, England's Green Lung or even the more obscure Swedish group Terra Firma who put out a couple records at the end of the 90s into the new millennium.

It's 100% guitar awesome-sauce here, every lick taking the familiar and improvising it just so slightly with a tasteful twist of note progressions. It flows more than crushes, so it's never verging on the drudge side of doom metal; at it's darkest, you'll get a bluesy burner like "Evil Man" which makes great use of the bass for the verses, perforated with little guitars that steer towards the chords of the chorus, or "The Seeker" which just burns you with great riffs and a hard rock structure. But it's never all that dark, which might seem a betrayal of the artwork, titles and lyrics, but that's about the only complaint. I'd say that the playing is more adventurous than your average stoner rock, there's just more going on, I don't know if it takes 'risks' per se but there's a bit more flair, like they don't want to be confined to the same conventions, and it always sticks to your ears, well-written and anchored by a flawless drum and bass combo that lets the riffing express itself but gives its some breadth and dimension.

The vocals are also really good, with a bit of that snide, acidic 'wasteoid' sound to them that we so love in Uncle Acid, but they're not as washed out or saturated. I think there are also some parallels to Swede hard rock/metal bands like Ghost or Chronus only the music here is far different beneath that piercing, melodic cleanness. Production is damn good too although this is something they'd improve with their  sophomore Dreams of the Dead a whole seven years later, an album that takes the concepts here and makes them richer, more complex and memorable; but make no mistake about it, The Witching Hour was a very solid start, an album I still come back to on occasion. Cool horror lyrics (even if the music doesn't contribute as much creepiness here), great riffing and singing make Doctor Smoke one of the more hopeful acts on the US scene that might be able to step into the footprints of the titans.

Verdict: Win [8.25/10]

https://www.facebook.com/doctorsmokeband

Lucifer - V (2024)

The first few singles I had heard of Lucifer V before its release were alright, but didn't leave me quite so excited as I was for its predecessors. Turns out that was the usual smoke & mirrors of maybe a label or band members choosing material that wasn't quite the best, because nearly every other track on this album is absolutely the nut. It might lack some degree of surprise and progression that I'd felt for prior entries, and a lot of the writing here seems like it's hanging out on the plateau with Lucifer IV, but still snooping about for points of ascent, higher grounds to scale of pools of diabolic lava to dip its toes into, and in the end I've even come around to some of those advance tracks as cogs in a very consistent, grooving occult hard rock machine.

The moody "Slow Dance in a Crypt" and "At the Mortuary" were the two I had encountered, and the former has its place as something bluesier, but a little too predictable in its progressions. Still, if you're at the prom, with someone missing most of their flesh, I think this is the exact sort of song you'd hear playing in the end credits of that particular Carrie sequel, and it does have a nice twist in the end with the pianos and elevating vocal line. But when you've got so many other scorchers here like the Priest-y "Fallen Angel", or "Riding Reaper" which I could hear ending up on an old 70s Scorpions album, everything really balances out. Lucifer revels in taking the familiar and then giving it a little spin here, a chord change there that makes it freshly memorable and unique to their own legacy. A few of my favorites here are tucked away near the end like the rocking "Strange Sister", or another bluesy piece, the creeping "Nothing Left to Lose but My Life", but by this point I've listened through the whole album and don't find any compulsion to skip past anything.

Production is steller, the band pulls off one of those cleaner 70s-style atmospheres and yet it can go toe to toe with modern rock, and helps translate the darker vibes to the guitars. It's just a perfect tone for everything...organs, acoustics, drums, and especially Johanna's voice, which is still one of the best out there, she might not have the craziest range, but there's a wicked smoothness to her pitch that hangs tight even when she becomes a little more desperate and shrill, and again it adds to the sense that this is an unearthed relic. But that's not to take away from the other players here, like Nicke who's fills and thundering totally moor "Maculate Heart" so that it kicks even further ass, and the sweet guitars of Martin and Linus which knock out the harder punching chords and burn bluesy through the airbrushed muscle car nightscape this album once again created for the Swedes. Another excellent Lucifer album, I'd probably place it on par with III, I had a slightly stronger connection to IV; though at this rate I hope they can keep this up to X.

Verdict: Epic Win [9/10]

https://www.facebook.com/luciferofficial

Blackstar Rising - Barbed Wire Soul (1997)

It's always interested me that so many of the Carcass alumni spent their time during their mainstay's hiatus forming or joining bands that were oriented towards more traditional hard rock, heavy metal or even stoner rock in the case of Michael Amott's Spiritual Beggars. I think for the rest of the blokes, Swansong was the clear indicator of this direction, and album I wasn't terribly thrilled about, being so fanatic over the three albums before it. In hindsight, it had some fairly catchy material on there, but it felt like a real watering down of the deatht/thrashing they had perfected with Heartwork, and perhaps just too distant from their goregrind roots to even consider it the same band. For those on board with that album's sound, however, there was BlackStar Rising, the band they formed in the other's wake, which could now further that hard rocking style without the burden of a brand name associated with medical textbooks and meat repulsion.

Barbed Wire Soul is a little more seasoned than Swansong, a mix of hard rock tropes from the 70s and 80s but with slightly more aggressive riff-work and musicianship than you'd encounter from any band of hair-sprayed sellouts working the Sunset Strip. It's almost like someone metalized Aerosmith, and changed the vocals to sound a bit more road-worn and limited in range than Tyler. There's a bit of obnoxious and generic boogie behind some of the tracks, but never to the point it gets annoying, and on tracks like "Sound of Silence" or "Give Up the Ghost", it's apparent they were trying to be creative in a space that would be considered more traditional. In fact, the latter and several others do feel like they could have been Swansong outtakes, but now they weren't afraid to ramp up some of the bluesy qualities and the 'party' rock & roll mentality that they were probably denying themselves complete access to while still in Carcass. Obviously, these guys are overly competent for this style of rock, so it's too their credit that they take a step back and really fall in to relish their roles.

Having said all this, while Barbed Wire Soul is a decent record, it's sometimes cheesy and not all that memorable compared to anything they had written other than perhaps Swansong or the truly crude Reek of Putrefaction (unless you are a goregrind fanatic). It's certainly more accomplished and varied at exploring this hard rock style than Swansong, but do I like it more in the end? I can't say that for sure, only that it's nowhere near as good as a lot of the Spiritual Beggars material; but I was happy they got the chance to get this out of their systems, and later return to proper business with the successful Carcass reunion material, which is not the be-all, end-all some make it out to be, but light years more engaging for me than BlackStar Rising.

Verdict: Win [7/10]

Lucifer IV (2021)

I would have been content if Lucifer could keep putting out equivalents to Lucifer II and III for the rest of my years, but they had to go and do one better, with an album that continues their descent into a slightly darker territory, but still fully within the envelope of sound they had been developing over their first three. 70s cult hard rock and blues swathed in a blanket of doom and modern occult rock, from a band of musicians that simply do not make any wrong choices when they're picking which riff to sear out into the listeners' consciences, or up against Johanna's addictive vocal style. The reliance on simple but often subtly menacing title and lyrics also helps round out the aesthetic, and sure, the band's name might preclude them from the international stardom I think they deserve, but only because so much of humanity are a bunch of fucking squares.

The material here isn't outside the wheelhouse of the previous album, but notice right away that the tones are a bit heavier, some of her vocal effects a little more raw, and they waste no time introducing this to you with "Archangel of Death" or "Wild Hearses", both beautiful and ponderous pieces that slosh around in the bluesy murk until its time to enchant you with a chorus. And then they have to go and unleash my single favorite riff of 2021 with "Crucifix (I Burn for You)"...imagine Slayer wrote that one on an album just after Seasons in the Abyss? This track and "Bring Me His Head" are the 'fun' and arguably most radio rock ready tracks on the album, but by no means is this the end of its depth of riches. "Mausoleum" frights and delights with its funereal organ intro and spacious, almost Moody Blues atmosphere, while "Cold as a Tombstone" creeps along like a proto-metal spider across the covers you hide under at night, and "Phobos" makes for a surging, epic, climax to the whole affair. This definitely feels like Lucifer III with an added layer of grime and muscle to it, the poppy 70s inflections still intact, and still plenty of adventure as they field a number of guitar and bass lines that feel fresh for their catalogue.

It's simply unbelievable how good this is, and I remember getting the album right in the depths of my beloved Halloween season and instantly confused how they could have gotten better yet again! It just seems like such a simple curve that they'd lock it all in and produce their masterpiece within an album or two, and yet with each new record you get a little more weight and depth, songs that resonate even longer than the previous, and yet you can still trace even the extremes of Lucifer IV straight back to the toe-dipping on the first album. To me, that is the mark of a fantastic hard rock or heavy metal band, and Lucifer are easily one of the best to arrive in this past decade. Catchy and yet never cheap or cheesy, thoughtful even when they're clubbing you over the head with one of their harder rocking rhythms, and sometimes as beautiful as the light of the morning star. A delicate terror. May they reign under the tree of forbidden fruit forever.

Verdict: Epic Win [9.5/10]

https://www.facebook.com/luciferofficial

Kadavar & Lucifer - Split EP (2021)

This split combining the talents of two of our better 70s-flavored retro hard rocking doom bands was sure to be a treat, with the caveat that they weren't performing material of their own, or even covering each others' songs, but instead diving back into the 60s and 70s to highlight some of their influences. So this one isn't quite like the later collaboration between Kadaver and Elder, where they literally make a record together, but more of an aesthetic coupling, and it actually works quite well. As a fan of both these bands, I thought they did a good job at taking the tunes and molding them into their own sounds, and would not be opposed to hearing them both dive deeper into those record bins of olde and infusing a lot more lost classics with their contemporary energy.

Okay, I don't know that "The Green Manalishi (With the Two Prong Crown)" qualifies as a 'lost' classic, but Germans Kadavar give it a slightly doomier spin to distance their version from other popular covers, the obvious being Judas Priest. So this one probably sounds a more earthy and '1969' in tone, with these rich, raw guitars that vibrate and resonate in a wonderful tone, and it's also got a real looseness to it, with lots of space in there to just vibe on you. It's pretty cool and sounds like it could be pulled off live in this same configuration at a 1:1 ratio. For Lucifer's contribution, they revisit "Pull Away/So Many Times" off of unsung New York heroes Dust's sophomore album Hard Attack. This is really brought into the fold of their own sound, and with a tweak or two would have fit snugly in any any of their four Roman numerated albums. Joanna sounds enchanting as always, but I liked too that they had her exchange with a male vocals, and both the acoustics and the rocking electric parts here sound really great. 

The one downside is that this is here and gone in 10 minutes, while the covers are so tasteful and cool that I wish I could hear about an hour's worth of them from each band, not only to hear interpretations of songs I might already know diving through my own hard rock, prog and metal memories of that period, but possibly even to discover some new stuff I never explored. It probably isn't too costly to splurge for the 7" of this, and that seems the most fitting way to experience, but you can also check it out digitally, so do so, and then if you haven't already, check out all of Lucifer's albums, which are fucking ace (in ascending order of quality), and Kadavar records like Berlin, Rough Times, and especially for the Dead Travel Fast, which are also damn worthy. I think such influences really rub off on their own sounds and it's so great to hear this sort of heavy rock alive in the 2020s.

Verdict: Win [7/10]

https://www.kadavar.com/

https://www.facebook.com/luciferofficial

Lucifer III (2020)

I like to imagine that the ascending Roman numerals Lucifer sticks on their successive albums are a 'leveling up' system, because within just the first few tracks, Lucifer III has already dominated the rock-solid earlier entries in their catalogue. A beefier tone, and a tendency towards some doomier riffs really helps round out their sound, making them feel, ironically, more true to their Rise Above Records roots than ever. The performances also seem to be a bit sharper, I mean we expect good things from all of these guys and gal, but it's down to the details here, such as leads, percussion choices and so forth that are just a lot catchier and better considered. That's not to knock the first two Lucifer albums, both of quality, but III is just jamming with memorable hooks, and it's not one I ever really want to skip through, even if I do have favorites.

"Ghosts" and the eternally groovy "Midnight Phantom" are just an awesome opening combo, the latter one of my choice cuts in their discography, but both have these doom breakdowns, the first some deep, evil riffs and a lead that cultivates a bit of Middle Easter mystique, and the latter just smoking with the clap percussion, the little howl that disappears into its nightscape, a smoking chorus and killer bridge groove which preludes a great little lead. And then, the hits keep coming as they stretch the net and welcome a lot of warmer 70s tones in "Leather Demon", "Pacific Blues" and "Flanked by Snakes". Or how about that "Coffin Fever", to which I could almost hear Lee Dorian laying vocals over...no wonder he originally signed this band! There is really nothing even bordering on a weak track here...it's a burning, soulful, bluesy and when it needs to be, heavy record in which every measure seems to have been well plotted. Lucifer is deceptively simple, but not as much as they could be, and so a lot of the little one-off bluesy licks, effects, pianos, or whatever you'll hear accompanying the central riffs are beautiful.

Johanna continues to dazzle, and I am continuously impressed by how much she pulls off with a range some might consider rather limited in scope. She's humble and emotive, like a lot of the 70s folk or female hard rock singers, and it's just a hypnotic contrast when paired up against the heavier, drubbing guitars or the wailing, bluesy solos. I love the clean tone they get, it's not terribly fuzzy, but super smooth and still feels just as 'stoner' as the messier psyche metal bands. The bass sounds perfect, locking in a fill or groove where it needs to stand out, and I don't think Nick's drumming requires any more praise than it's already gotten, but what is this, the fifth style the guy has excelled at in his long and illustrious career? Well I've gotta thank Nick and Johanna personally one of these days (maybe I just did), because they've put together one of the most bewitching, mellow and sneakily heavy retro hard rock bands I've heard in decades, and Lucifer III has gotten many plays over the last year. Bonus points for something my wife can listen to with me.

Verdict: Epic Win [9/10]

https://www.facebook.com/luciferofficial

Lucifer II (2018)

Lucifer II does mark a partial change of direction from the debut, but it does so without neglecting the bands roots and initial premise to catapult the qualifies of 70s hard rock and proto doom metal into contemporary times. Immediately more accessible, rockin' and shufflin' than the doomier gloom of its older sibling, its a memorable and inspirational introduction to what would become the more stable Lucifer line-up. And that would of course involve the legendary Nicke Andersson of Entombed, The Hellacopters, Imperial State Electric and Death Breath fame, a musician that excels in numerous genres and instruments, the now-husband of Johanna, and an addition whose presence is felt in the excellent craftsmanship of these tunes. Add another one-shot member in Robin Tidebrink, and they're off to the races, because while I was IMPRESSED with the first album, as I am with a lot of quality doom and retro metal, it was Lucifer II that really transformed me into the slobbering fan I am today. This one went into regular rotation when I was doing landscaping in the summer of 2018, and it hasn't left.

Lucifer II is a hit generator. Tracks like "California Son", "Before the Sun" and "Reaper On Your Heels" jab you with all the right grooves, a blend of Sabbath, Heart, maybe even a little Cream or Zeppelin in the riffage, but not limited to that, and Johanna's creamy crooning just dripping all over the smooth punch of the guitars. This is where they really started to load in the small atmospherics like pianos, bells, organs (as in "Reaper...") that only serve to enhance the songs without taking them over, and unlike the debut, there are no points where I felt there was an abrupt transition or a tune that needs further polish. This is all so well written and makes perfect sense, from the opening licks, to the escalating bridges where they'll burst into a more controlled freak-out groove. And those who think the doom is no longer strong with them, guess again, because half the tracks here have some notable, darker passage or underpinning groove that lets you know just what direction they've come from, and it ain't heaven. Nick is a phenomenon here, every tone carefully chosen, every bluesy swagger perfectly inserted, every beat so organic and fresh and interesting that you could almost listen to that alone.

There are no tracks here I dislike, but perhaps one or two that I'll skip from time to time (usually "Dancing with Mr. D" and its slide guitars and cooing backup vocals), so this one doesn't reach the ranks of the two after it, but what a goddamn set you could create from all three, and maybe add a couple in from the debut for good measure. When they get down and dirty as on "Faux Pharaoh" it just feels so badass, that contrast between the ditch-digging rhythm guitar and the melody of her voice feels so unique even when compared to similar groups. Not to dump on popular groups like Witch Mountain, Brume, Windhand  or Sabbath Assembly, all of whom put out some good stuff, but Lucifer just tramples it all. There is so much more to this, and it brings together so many influences that were formative also to my own metal history, that I cannot resist. It's like a spell being cast every time they put out an album, and I keep failing my fucking saving throw.

Verdict: Win [8.75/10]

https://www.facebook.com/luciferofficial

Lucifer I (2015)

It's nothing novel to hear some new Sabbath sounding upstart arrive on a label like Rise Above Records, but when the simply dubbed Lucifer dropped its debut in 2015, it was obvious to me immediately that this was something special, something slightly different. Granted, this album is the one we would most correlate with traditional doom metal, there are a lot of riffs here that feel as if Tony Iommi is playing along with a new singer, but other 70s hard rock influences like Heart do enter the picture in a few of the songs, foreshadowing the band's future. The band was formed by German vocalist Johanna Sadonis, and then most notably, the debut featured 'Gaz' Jennings, axeman doomlord extraordinaire via Cathedral, and a mix of other British and German musicians, all of whom, with the except of Johanna, lasted for just this one debut album...

And that might explain why this has a slightly different focus than the subsequent releases, but it's a great record all the same. Bright, catchy, and yet unmistakably evil when it wants to be, Lucifer I plays out like a more vintage rock Cathedral, replacing Lee's divisive grumblings with a voice both melodic and angelic. Jennings' guitars are great, whether he's flexing the doom muscles of his alma mater, or some dirtier riff patterns redolent of American groups like Pentagram and The Obsessed, or earlier influences, there's always something catchy to support Johanna's wailing, which is a lot more atmospheric than on the later records. Granted, there are occasions where the riffs go into some abrupt changes, and the material doesn't always feel the most fleshed-out, but for a debut it was already head and shoulders above a lot of the other 'mama' doom that had been coming out around the same time. Dino Gollnick and Andrew Prestridge round out the rhythm section really well, and the sparse synths and ghostly vocal layering and effects add another, ethereal dimension to the drudging darkness.

No tunes I'd consider weak here, but I most often crave the doomy triad of "Abracadabra", "Sabbath" (lol) and "Morning Star". That said, the acoustics in "Grave" are nice, and it has a nice metallic build-up, and it's all quality enough that the full 44 experience is rewarding. I admit that I do spin this one less than the three to follow it, but if you're most in tune with traditional doom metal, and not so much interested in the higher accessibility of the later albums, do not skip out on Lucifer I because it just might prove your favorite. And it's a testament to Lucifer that, no matter which lineup, the band is just so damned good that I can't argue with anyone's love of any of their output. The hours of enjoyment I've gotten listening to them in the last 6-7 years vastly outweigh the praise and thanks I could ever give them.

Verdict: Win [8.25/10]

https://www.facebook.com/luciferofficial

Rip Ryde - A Taste for the Kill (2022)

Just one glance at the cover to A Taste for the Kill and I'm taken back to the 80s when I'd be cruising the mall for metal records, and in addition to the thrash and harder stuff there would be this crop of bands which sat in the median between the trendier, terrible glam rock and the heavy metal proper. My love for bands like Dokken, Bonfire, King Kobra, etc came from within this margin, and it's clear that Cleveland's Rip Ryde had a similar fascination because they have managed to recapture this same feeling on their indie debut. I'm not too surprised, because the lineup here is pretty ridiculous, almost a who's who of Ohio goodness, featuring members of Soulless, Shed the Skin, Vanik, Vindicator, Ringworm, and Shok Paris. And while the album takes a track or two to really take off, it's packed with accessible, catchy metal that's prepped to party on the surface, but also has enough of a genuine emotion and intelligence behind it to matter more than that.

I'll say that the opener, "Stop, Rip and Roll", with its very Dokken-like riff, didn't exactly hook me as I felt like it was the vocalist's weakest performance on the album. He's got a good, everyman voice with a capability for a little pitch, almost an amalgam of a blue-collar Midwest bar front man and a NWOBHM hero ala Biff Byford, but I just didn't pick him out too much as he was following along the guitars in the verses. Still, the little splashes of fun, bluesy hard rock leads, and the production tone on the rest of the instruments is pretty promising, and though the song was a little repetitive, it's a good teaser for their style, which improves very quickly on cuts like the similar, flailing "My Oh My" or "Legends for the End", and these are catchier with the vocals and guitar melodies. The chord patterns are pretty simple, and hardly novel, but infused with just enough legit 80s melody circa Scorpions or Maiden that they really hammer home, and this band is very adept at setting up solid rhythm guitar hooks to support the awesome leads, which don't exactly 'duel' but have a nice, memorable interchange that takes you back.

It gets to the point where even the band's most overt attempts at a more 'party' theme like "Sweet Rocket Girl" still don't come off excessively cheesy, even when the singer is giving it a bit too much rock & roll gusto, and even that song has a very "Delivering the Goods" vibe. When the band dials it down for a ballad like "Into the Darkness Again", it's earned and not at all cheap, a solid construction and really good lead-work/bridge in there transformed it into one of my favorites on the album, and the rapid melodies of "Dance for the Massacre" really sealed the deal. A Taste for the Kill is fun but never shallow, nearly every riff here is imbued with a love for its influences, and from a cast of characters who have cast a pretty broad net in the past, from other heavy metal projects to raucous speed/thrash to blistering melodic death metal. Maybe the malls suck these days, but your life doesn't have to, so whether you dig the old 70s Priest, Saxon and Maiden, the more accessible side of the Metal Blade roster in the 80s, or the new weave of Canadian metalians and hard rockers (Cauldron, Freeway, Spell, etc), this is worth at least a listen, and the blood and cleavage are the cherries on top.

Verdict: Win [8/10]

https://ripryde.bandcamp.com/

Picture - Every Story Needs Another Picture (1986)

I was hardly any hesher hunk to take advantage of the 80s hair metal sex and fashion, I was too young and dweeby at the time (and the latter does remain an apt description for me now), but something within me always stirs, partly from attraction and partly from laughter, at all these smutty old album covers. She's got a picture...of the band Picture...and she's stalking some private eye dude down the steamy city street in nylons, high heels and leather skirt. And it's on Backdoor records! If you used this as a cover today, I'd still think you were awesome, but there was something so sleazy and entertaining about it back in the day, and I like the color scheme and it strangely sort of mirrors the colors of their better known, more evil looking 1983 album Eternal Dark.

These Dutchmen are best known for that early 80s batch of records, at the crossroads between NWOBHM style heavy metal and more mainstream hard rock, which put them on trajectory for a level of international renown that they sadly didn't ever quite achieve. It's kind of cool to have a couple Picture albums around if you're showing off your old vinyl collection, but even then it's not a group I ever see a lot of people having discussions over. Every Story Needs Another Picture was already the group's sixth album, and it certainly seemed too timid in a year that was producing records like Master of Puppets, Somewhere in Time and Reign in Blood, but listening back on this one now with a fresh appreciation, it was actually a bit more busy and developed than some of their earlier, more straightforward stuff, and it has the sort of authentic 80s atmosphere to it that a lot of bands today fall over themselves trying to emulate. This album effectively sounds as it looks, something you'd chase into the urban nightscape, blaring out of the open windows of your Corvette or Trans Am or whatever was popular to drive in Holland at the time.

The guitars have a heavy foundation of hard rock and blues to them, sometimes using effects as you'd expect from a group like The Dire Straits on their ginormous hit, or ZZ Top, but just as often you've got a traditional feel that reminds me a lot of Whitesnake throughout the 80s. There are some synths here to give it that radio appeal, but also a lot of organs and such which also summon up some Uriah Heep or Deep Purple references. I'd venture that tunes like "Burning for Your Love" even leap off into a mix of mildly prog rock influences with the keyboard lead,s mixed with AOR arena rock for the predictable but functional verse guitar riffs. Vocalist Bert Heerink, who had taken over for Pete Lovell on the previous year's Traitor, has a nice, slicing high pitched voice which is smooth at encompassing all the melodies required over this material. The album does suffer from some softer rock anthems like "Stay With Me" or dull rockers like "She Was Made for Lovin'", but where they get a little more bombastic and intense like the first track "Battle Cruiser" and its cool opening choirs, or "Moving Down the Line", it's quite good stuff..."You Took My Money, You Took My Pride" and "Stand Back for the People in Charge" are also quite fun, the latter even with hints of Boston or Zebra in it.

I just wish there were more ambition here. I think if you like group such as Lion or Dokken, there is a chunk of this album worth your time, and a kernel of their sound was trying to go a little bit further than just the mundane butt-rock that they were undoubtedly pressured towards at the time, because it was either write some giant radio or hair metal hits, or get utterly fucking trampled by the heavier strains of the genre that were hitting in full-force by that time. Every Story Needs Another Picture does not accomplish either of those ends, but as an artifact of the 80s it's not bad if you have a soft nostalgia for AOR or lighter metal that really treads the line.

Verdict: Indifference [6.5/10]

https://www.pictureband.nl/

Lordi - Monstereophonic (Theaterror vs. Demonarchy) (2016)

Lordi is a band I denied for several years, shrugging them off as a mere GWAR knockoff. As it turns out, this was shortsighted and foolish; as my fondness for shock rock has only improved with age, I decided to return to their discography and discovered that I like quite a lot of their records, not the least of which is their 2016 opus Monstereophonic (Theaterror vs. Demonarchy), a mouthful of a title which is really to signify that this is sort of split into two albums; the first half representing some more fun-oriented, goofy party tracks and the latter half encompassing a miniature concept album in which the music gets a little more serious, technical and almost transforms into Lordi's answer to the rock opera.

Now, on one level I was not mistaken with the GWAR comparisons...certainly the band's elaborate prosthetics and stage get-ups, while not taken to the same extreme, are comparable to the Scumdogs of the Universe. Mr. Lordi's meaty, gritty vocal style also highly resembles the late Oderus Urungus, if a little more sustained and gravel-chewing. They occasionally also strike the same general level of heaviness, while remaining accessible to a broad metal audience following several genres. But where GWAR was rooted more directly in punk and thrash, Lordi have evolved their shock rock ambitions into a panoply of thrash, heavy metal, groove metal, rock opera and 80s hard rock complete with a heavy use of dated synthesizers that remind me simultaneously of cheesy AOR tunes and stuff like the intro to Ozzy's "Mr. Crowley". That they are able to assemble all of these aesthetics into one seamless whole is impressive, especially on this 64 minute, 14-track juggernaut upon which there isn't a single tune void of some extremely catchy riffs, chorus lines, or arrangements.

It does start off a little corny with a narrative horror intro and then "Let's Go Slaughter He-Man (I Wanna Be the Beast-Man in the Masters of the Universe)", which, if you couldn't already tell is a childhood relation towards the villains in the He-Man universe. It's not that I didn't once share this same sentiment, but the lyrics here are dumb as rocks. Likewise with the cringe-worthy sex anthem "Hug You Hardcore", focused exclusively on rear entry. Now, ironically, the music in both of these tunes is quite good...the former a synth-laden hard rocker which reminded me of their fellow Finns Twilightning, and the latter a super groovy rock track with a simple but unforgettable riff gimmick that I'm surprised nobody had ever tried before. So yes, despite their lyrical shortcomings, neither is a track I'd ever skip when listening through the album, and it's no wonder that "Hug You Hardcore" is their choice for a video, which strangely seems to feature more of a slasher theme and doesn't much have to do with the words...whiiiiiich, might be for the best!

After that point, while a few of the lyrics might still be plebeian ("Down with the Devil"), the rest of the music is quite excellent, with a huge dynamic range, from the slow and grooving "Mary is Dead" to the dirty heavy metal of "Sick Flick" to the power metal that inaugurates "Demonarchy" itself. The arrangements of the tunes are just about perfect, with lots happening through the synths and other instruments, but the ability to still come together for an amazing chorus. They employ a few higher screamed vocals which create a cool contrast with Mr. Lordi's usual tone, and maintain a kind of modern, creepy haunted theme park feel throughout. Production on the disc is polished but really perfect in allowing the listener to experience every intricate note, with nothing too loud or muted in the mix, no mean feat when you consider the wide range of riffs on exhibition. That the album goes over an hour without ever firing off a misplaced measure to me is staggering, perhaps not every riff or line is unique, but assembled together they offer quite a substantial window into shock rock contemporary and future, and Monstereophonic is a much less silly than it looks. Far less childish than its early attempts to derail itself. A whole lotta fun.

Horror-meter: Six out of ten underpaid makeup artists.

Verdict: Win [8.75/10] (scheming the night through)

https://www.lordi.fi/

Skull - No Bones About It (1991)

No Bones About It suffered as a misplaced artifact for around when it came out, largely because the hard music landscape was in such a state of transformation. Death metal bursting forth angrily from the belly of thrash, grunge taking over the airwaves from hard rock, glam struggling to hang onto to its largely miserable and laughable existence. Things were in such a state of transition that signing on a band like Skull must have been a risk, despite the pedigree of its seasoned roster. Granted, there were a lot of similar groups who straddled the line between traditional heavy metal and the more radio friendly hard rock of Van Halen, Bon Jovi, Quiet Riot and the like, so this could hardly be considered an anomaly, but it's a stretch to imagine any record executive with his/her hands on a magic 8-ball would have risked rolling these particular bones. And I could not have blamed them.

The main selling point here is that Skull was as a vehicle for ex-Kiss guitarist Bob Kulick, who had played uncredited on a number of tracks on a number of their albums, and also alongside acts like Meat Loaf, Alice Cooper, Lou Reed and Michael fucking Bolton to name a few. The other bigger name in this lineup was drummer Bobby Rock of Alcatrazz, Nitro and Lita Ford fame. Had this very same album drummed a few years prior, maybe 1987-1988, I can see it having had the potential for some limited rotation on channels like MTV or you local hard rock broadcaster. It's not as sickly sweet at sucky bands like the US Warrant, Poison or Slaughter, but the band has a lot of flair, hits hard enough for their genre that even metal purists might find something to like, and singer Dennis St. James had an expressive enough presence somewhere in the midst of David Coverdale, Ian Gillan, David Lee Roth and Don Dokken. Lots of rock & roll oohs and aahs that you'd expect from someone likely willing to grab his crotch and ricochet his hips around as much as it takes to put on a memorable show. That the lyrics here are so lame, trivial and cliche-ridden is rather moot, this was not a niche within rock music with a ton of thought or depth behind it, but rather a feel good sedative for the every man who just wanted to rock out with his lady or buds. I mean there's literally a lyrical line 'so we'll meet a few girls, drink a few beers' to which the backup vocals respond 'who's buyin'?'

Pedestrian party rock for bars and strip joints looking for something else when they'd spun all their Mötley Crüe and Britney Fox albums until the grooves wore down. I admit I wanted to tear this record apart when I was first listening through it, such insipid tripe as it is, but as I grow older myself I've gained a sort of strange, masochistic fondness for some cheesy metal which I would have thrown my devil horns at as a teenage and then hissed at is if I was some vampire struck by a bulb of garlic from a Stryper fan's slingshot. No Bones About It is entirely harmless and formulaic, with a slight divide between the more groovy, bluesy boogie metal cuts like "Little Black Book" and "Eyes of a Stranger", power ballad lameness like "This Side of Paradise", and then a series of mildly more serious, moody, engine burners like "Breaking the Chains" and "Loser's Game". And if the titles of some of these tracks look identical to other song or album titles that were popular at the time, just move right along. As redundant as the album really was for its day, I do admit to nodding my head along to some of the riffs and vocal lines, appreciating the strong guitar tone, and the lead work of a guy who was only passed over for Ace Frehley (and, eventually, ironically, his own little brother). The drums are pounding and effective, really the band had the 'whole package' that was just cut off by being beaten to the punch many times, and lacking a promotional push and touring itinerary that would have taken them to the next level.

Is this sole Skull album a curiosity for anyone outside a diminished audience of omni-rockers who like their hard rock as much as their heavier metal? Not really, so I'd advise checking out a band like Fifth Angel or Banshee who were exponentially superior at straddling that divide, but if you've a penchant for cheesy rarities and failed dreams, or a passion for big arena cock rock, then this Skull might be in session. Bob Kulick once lent Jimi Hendrix a guitar string, so the least you can do is lend this justifiable obscurity an ear for a few minutes.

Verdict: Indifference [5.75/10]

The Order of the Solar Temple - s/t (2014)

Don't be put off by the first track on this - "Fallout Woman" - which feels like a weird amalgamation of The Doors, Cream, The Cult and even a little of Mike Patton in the vocal sustain until the higher pitched screaming erupts. It's mildly representative of the rest of the album, and an entertaining tune in of itself, but what I really reacted to so strongly about The Order of the Solar Temple's eponymous debut is how it successfully re-brands NWOBHM-era riffing into a unique, psychedelic haze. Granted, we've heard a hundred bands reaching back into the 60s and 70s proto-occult prog rock field these past few years to attempt to rekindle those treasured ley lines of black magick, swords and sorcery, and hippie free lust...but so rarely do they sound the same...Ghost does not = Hail Spirit Noir does not = Blizaro does not = The Devil's Blood does not = Tame Impala. Yeah, the topical matter might feel samey, but I for one enjoy the feeling of revivification, compositional refreshment, new voices putting their own spin on their perceived notions of the rock of decades past...rose-scented, rose-colored nostalgic vibrations.

Vancouver triad Order of the Solar Temple adds yet another timbre into this choir, and a welcome one, incredibly varied and consistent in turns. Vocals shift between a Morrison-like drug den haze, to cheesy metal screams, to a strong mid-range redolent of the big BBs (Biff Byford, and in particular Blaze fucking Bayley) of English lore. Riffing progressions fall well within the span of the later 70s to about 1982, we're talking bands like Budgie, Angel Witch and Nightwing more so than Priest or Sabbath, but everything is fair game on this record. Pumping, shuffling, classy hard rock patterns are threaded with bluesy tail-licks and glistening, teary little leads and harmonies that eschew pretentious technicality to de-age the listener about 40 years, which in some cases will transform he or she into a pre-fetus, ready to have all of this wonderful rock impressed upon their being as they are squirted into existence. Once in awhile they'll be a lower end groove which borders on bad-ass (as heard in the midst of the track "Jervas Dudley"), but in general, beyond the experimental touches, like the unique use of instruments such as the Jew's harp, Mellotron and photo-theremin; or the more lavish, gradually orchestrated sequences (intro to "Aeon of Horus", for example), this is some pretty huge sounding retro heavy metal with an open-ended, airy production that is sheer bliss in the car speakers on a summery afternoon.

Bass-lines definitely cultivate the retro aesthetics further, simultaneously overt and subtle, grooves often closing the gaps between rock music and the excellent vocal R&B that our great-grandparents probably thought of as devil-spawned pap. The drums crash where they need to be, definitely busier than what you'd hear on a radio tune half a century past, reminiscent of how their fellow Canadians Blood Ceremony really lay into a groove. Leads in tunes like "Fallout Woman" also have a sporadic, improvised nature to them which you'd expect of some wailing blues busybody on tour in a dingy bar setting, and that all helps you down to get down! And that is what The Order of the Solar Temple is really all about: GETTING DOWN into the ritualistic corners of the imagination, making out or making love with a beautiful specter while a skull gazes on, wax from its cranial mounted candle sputtering down the cracks and gaps in the bone. If Anton LaVey had written Strange Days or Waiting for the Sun or Disraeli Gears while envisioning another Solar Temple in the future; it might sound a little something like this, and if you're not into that idea, well then please pack up your gear, leave the key on the kitchen table and forget we ever met on that seedy internet chat room that one fateful nite...because I don't wanna know you. I wanna hot shower away every trace of intimacy that we ever shared.

Verdict: Win [8.5/10]

https://www.facebook.com/theorderofthesolartemple

Burning Saviours - Boken om förbannelsen (2014)

I remember first checking out Burning Saviours nearly a decade ago, they were definitely one of those 70s throwback/doom bands, alongside countrymen Witchcraft, who seemed to be taking the whole thing to the next logical step of nostalgic retrogression. That's to say they sound a lot like a band from 40 years ago, even to the point where the production on their records mimics that formative epoch. Now, three records and a number of single recordings later, they haven't altered the approach; so Boken om förbannelsen, a collection of four single recordings spanning 2011-2013, is pretty much textbook Sabbath/Cream worship which succeeds in sounding like the hard rock of the members' now distant youths...and whether or not you'll enjoy this really depends on your ability to stomach more of that relatively idea-less, retro rock & roll which seeks to stand on the ceremony of pre-paved riffing progressions and songwriting structures rather than fire up an original spark.

I'd say that, while this sounds pretty authentic in terms of how the instruments are mixed and having a singer (Mikael Monks) with some genuine charisma, this well might just have been tapped too often and for too long to preclude me turning up my noise at some of the chord progressions, which are more or less timid rehashes of songs like "War Pigs" or a million others you could tune into on your local endless commercially recycled hard rock radio station right this second. A lot of those spider-crawling blues grooves that people have been getting high to since 1969, threaded with a slightly tormented melodic scream which is very able at sculpting a chorus which resonates far more than the rest of the songs. That these tunes were penned to be singles is evident, so there's a lot of consistency in terms of their pacing, a lot of chemistry between them, some even being thematically linked. The guitar tone is fantastically clear with just a little of that genuine old 70s mud, while the leads are relatively raw and emotional and generally well enough written...the bass plods away without much individuality and the drums are lethargic but a perfect fit to the peppy mid-speeds.

They do occasionally deviate from the central rock formula here, like the eaves of ringing harmonic blues that inaugurate "Doomus Maximus" or "I Am Lucifer", but at the most modern the latter sounds like an alternative to the Ghost debut Opus Eponymous with a different vocalist. To be truthful, people who love that album will actually appreciate this a lot from a more directly Sabbath-ian vein, there are certainly a number of cuts like the cleaner "Midnight" or "The Offering" which give off the vibe of ritualistic pipe-smoking hippie doom wafting through the rafters of our nostalgia. Ultimately, while I have no question that the band members were able to tap into that lifeblood of ancient heavy metal while in-session to compose these, and perhaps felt the same wonders of their predecessors, they're only doing that by basically borrowing material that had come before and paraphrasing the note passages. Boken om förbannelsen is a pleasant, occasionally catchy offering, and it's nice to have the disparate singles collected into an actual product of higher value, but the Burning Saviours ultimately cop a little too much derivative inspiration to stand out from the shadows of their distant forerunners.

Verdict: Indifference [6/10]

https://www.facebook.com/burningsaviours

Mach II - Mach II (2009)

Mach II is more or less a 'supergroup' of the Ohio underground, a bunch of long time headbangers and hard rockers getting together to perform the music that inspired them as kids, long before the advent of extreme metal (that many of the roster have since taken up). Boasting a lineup that is either involved or was once aligned with acts like Midnight, Toxic Holocaust, Soulless, Nunslaughter and Destructor is definitely one way to perk up an avid listener, but more importantly, there are guys here who have been fighting the metallic fight since the 80s, from bands I never even heard of as a teen; so there is no question that this is a project borne of an authentic interest rather than a berth on the bandwagon of trendy relapsed hair metal or Spinal Tap wannabes that have reared their heads over the past half-decade.

That said, the sound these gentlemen have put together is 100% throwback, raw attitude rock that culls its songwriting from influences like KISS, Scorpions, AC/DC, or working class 80s NWOBHM from across the pond ala Saxon or Wolfsbane. You're not going to hear anything present that's any heavier than, say, W.A.S.P., and even that's a stretch despite the speed metal surges. The guitar riffs definitely capture that old blues-based hard rock vibe of the 70s and 80s, so prevalent in its transfer to popular radio/MTV, but they keep busy enough, slathered in a subtle crunch rather then a heap of distortion, keeping with the (old) times. You definitely get the feeling as you listen through the album that you're sitting in a rehearsal room with these guys, the warm ministrations of tube amps fluctuating through the dirty chords. All of the performances are pretty clear, with a nice clappy mix for the cymbals and kicks, and a decent swell of bass distinguishing it from the rhythm guitar, but the most noteworthy element is going to be the vocals of Mike Sorg, which are entirely down to earth, dead end blue collar in tone yet still able to carry enough melody to keep the varied tracks from becoming samey...

He's not got an enormous range, or even an acid harmony to his voice like a Vince Neil (more a Blaze Bayley), but he definitely sets up a mood as if you're listening to him on stage in some rundown bar through a haze of cigarette smoke, and the only beer you could afford with your hack paycheck. The leads didn't really stand out to me, only because a lot of the bluesy wailing seems to trite to me after hearing it for a million years, but they're par for the course for the aesthetic this band represents. I also dug the inclusion of three live tracks performed in Cleveland the year this album was released; they're a bit raucous and rumbly in spots, but you can tell the guitar tone really carries well in a club setting, as do the vocals. All in all, this is not so much an amazing debut as a study in aural comfort, especially for those of us who look back on the 80s with such fondness, having consciously lived through them as more than a fetus. Some of the harder hitting tracks like "Demon Queen" and "Stay Loud" will certainly thrill nostalgia seekers, and I think there's even a bit of speed metal crossover appeal for acts like Speedwolf and Midnight (though Mach II is less heavy). Fit for cruisin', boozin' and bruisin', if not steamy enough for a strip club.

Verdict: Win [7/10]

http://www.myspace.com/machiicleveland

Lizzy Borden - Master of Disguise (1989)

With such a towering achievement as Visual Lies underfoot, one that was simply unlikely to be reproduced or bettered by this particular group, it made a whole lot of sense to me that Lizzy Borden would try something different the next time, something even more ambitious. Enter Master of Disguise, a formidable and fulfilling work which is the most accessible of their career. The straight up melodic metal brilliance of the 1987 gem was subsumed into a more palatable, 'mainstream' sound involving simpler guitar riffs and a healthy dosage of rock opera orchestration which rears its head skillfully through a number of the tracks, and the result creates a healthy level of variation which is like no other album in their history.

To some degree, I can see that a certain subset of Lizzy Borden's audience might have found this record more or less a 'sellout' if compared to the more raucous early work like Love You to Pieces. It's not a sentiment I can completely disagree with. Clearly the Californians were reaching out to a broader cross section of rock fan with this statement, tightening up the production values of the music and reining in the riffs and vocals into an admittedly dryer delivery. But Master of Disguise is quality through and through, almost every song on the roster distinct and memorable from its neighbors (with just a few exceptions deeper on the bench). What's more, I view this as more of a 'fantasy' coming to fruition for the band members: who the fuck wouldn't want to work with an orchestra if given the choice? The fact that Lizzy Borden is able to adapt this symphonic element into the music without transforming the core of who they were is a testament to the restraint on this thing.

But the record is special for more than just this added instrumentation, or for having easier, catchier hooks than its predecessors. It's a deeply personal album which covers a lot of subject matter that just about anyone could relate to. An 'everyman' Operation: Mindcrime, if you will, which explores themes of love, sin, aging, and even the band's own status on the scales of history and rock stardom (or lack thereof), with a few nods to film and horror keeping in line with previous offerings. You can really feel the front man/first person's point of view here, his sorrow and wonder. The lyrics are mature, poignant and simple to browse, and the hooks throughout seem to mirror this intention. It reminds me a little of another album that was released in the same year, Savatage's Gutter Ballet, which had a similar emotional authenticity to it, even if certain components like the pianos, guitars and vocals were quite different.

Remarkably, the group had brought on two new guitarists here in David Michael Philips (of Icon and numerous other groups in the 80s) and Ronnie Jude. Perhaps their more hard rocking orientation lent itself to the general accessibility of the riffing, but to be honest I'm not sure that a more complex, wanking approach would have necessarily worked out in these songs anyway. Most of the rhythms here are simple, lightly muted patterns, cruise control for standard heavy metal in the trad, NWOBHM tradition; or in the more symphonic/ballad arrangements, like "One False Move" or the piano driven "Never Too Young", they just keep their cool with minimal presence in the notes and appropriately layered power chords. The leads woven throughout the songs aren't incredibly showy, they simply balance a bluesy, burning foundation with some more advanced dexterity and tapping, and it's more than enough.

As for the orchestra, it's used both in the more intense pieces like the thoroughly rocking "Psychodrama" where it creates a sort of 'haunted castle' aesthetic in the intro and then builds to a massive crescendo in the bridge; and the more subdued, moody spaces like "One False Move". Never intrusive, never even bordering on overwhelming the rock instruments, and tastefully implemented by composer William Kidd and his players. I even enjoy the use of the funky horns in the phone sex anthem "Love is a Crime", which might seem a little dated (like Extreme's sophomore Pornograffiti), but really help to make that chorus bad ass, beautiful and swaggering.

As for Lizzy himself, I can think of no other album in the group's history which allowed him so much space to breathe and let his intonation form each line, merely for the complacency of the riffing. That's not to say that I thought he was catchier here than on Visual Lies, but he runs up and down his range in tracks like "Waiting in the Wings" and "Never Too Young", proving he had what it takes to sing in a number of genres. You still experience the requisite, wailing fragility in his timbre, but he naturally had a huge part in the album's creation and he does not dispose of any opportunity to shine here. There were a few tunes here whose choruses did wax redundant: "Roll Over and Play Dead" seems a little close to "Be One of Us" and "Psychodrama", and there were already enough peaceful power ballad sorts that the acoustic "Under the Rose" might have been omitted.

Closer "We Got the Power" is the worst of the songs, though ,with ease. The hard rock riffs seem all too standard, without any sticking to the ear, and though the horns return, I didn't care for the vocals or the truly cliche title/chorus. Not that Master of Disguise is a particularly innovative or poetically charged record, but it feels like 45 minutes of brilliance capped off with a filler trilogy that reeks of 'B-side' material. Even despite the diminishing returns that fill out the near hour of material, though, Master of Disguise is a triumph, and the structure and joyous melodic eruptions through tunes like "Phantoms", "Psychodrama" and the title track are simply unforgettable. This is still a record I return to very often, and though it doesn't match the flawlessness of its predecessor, it deserved far, far more fucking attention than it ever received, even in such a masterful era as the late 80s.

Verdict: Epic Win [9.25/10] (a masquerade of thunder)

 http://www.lizzyborden.com/

Dezperadoz - Dead Man's Hand (2012)

I had pretty high hopes for the Dezperadoz project after hearing the 2000 debut The Dawn of Dying, because let's face it: Wild West themed metal is in short supply, and the thought of a German speed/thrash band taking up the idea and applying Tom Angelripper's vocals is quite inspirational. However, since that point Alex Kraft's project has taken a turn for the worse, upping the atmospherics and Western/cowboy cliches and pairing it with a modern pop production and a more melodic vocal edge that often reminds me of The Cult's Ian Astbury crossbred with Alice in Chain's Layne Staley. There are still distinctly heavy/power metal riffs in there, often with a bit of thrash or groove to them, but it just wasn't enough to justify all the cheese toppings.

Sadly, Dead Man's Hand does not take a 180 back to the roots of the outfit, so this is more or less a direct continuation of An Eye for An Eye, but I'll give Kraft some credit. He's a talented dude. His vocals cut a little more into the skin here, and in general the riffs are kept pretty heavy, a more hostile spin on the bluesy/grooves you'd hear from Zakk Wylde and company. Maybe The Cult or Skid Row if they were more 'metal'. They're often pretty threadbare and generic in nature, but back in the early 90s, where hard rock was one of the styles being subsumed into grunge or groove metal, an album like Dead Man's Hand likely would have found an audience. The production is high end, the use of pianos and acoustics and other instruments give it a massive, dynamic feel, and for the most part they seem to lay off the lame narrative interludes and other bits (they still exist, though). On the other hand, this is all so very cliche and song titles like "Just Like Cowboyzz" and "Yippie Ya Yeah" make it hard to take seriously. I realize the Dezperadoz are a bit of a fun gimmick, but not a 'funny' one.

If only this level of energy was applied to something more devout and vicious, Kraft would have one of the most unique bands out there. Instead of the silly stereotypes, go for broke with some greater concept and more complex, interesting music. You could still use the folksy guitars, the pianos, the theme, but how about steering it in more of an Unforgiven or Deadwood direction and less Blazing Saddles? Ditch the big melodic rock songs like "Train of Souls" and bring back some of that thrashing from the first album, because often this album feels about as Western as Bon Jovi's "Blaze of Glory" or "Wanted Dead or Alive" and no further. A lot of the lighter hearted throwback tracks like "My Ol' Rebel Heart' just plain suck, and there's no reason to swell up an album to an hour of content when you could just as well cut it down by 20 minutes and keep the more interesting, original sounding compositions.

These criticisms aside, though, I do feel that Dead Man's Hand is marginally better than the two albums before it, and if anyone out there was truly enamored with style established on The Legend and the Truth, then they might as well strap on the six shooters and run and gun with this. Aside from some of the goofiness, there was some effort in its construction, and Alex is a good singer if not a memorable one. But alas, the prize cow of Wild Western extreme metal has yet to be properly milked and butchered.

Verdict: Indifference [6.25/10]

 http://www.myspace.com/dezperadoz

Nigel Foxxe's Inc. - Censored (2003)

It's probably better to think of Censored as an afterthought rather than a new Nigel Foxxe's Inc. album, a thought that might have been better left within the brow of its creator than ever committed to the ears of those expecting War of the Godz Mk. II. Not that the man had gone reggae or calypso or anything, or written an R&B record: this is still metal music, at least marginally. But it's basically the very soft edge of commercial 80s AOR that was already well out of place, better suit to a crowd weaned on Kansas or Chicago than raging fantasy themed speed/thrash. War of the Godz was hardly a masterpiece, and Foxxe is best represented through his earlier work in the band Flames, but this must have seemed like a huge slap in the face to those few that had paid attention in the past.

The material here was written in about a decade's time, and considering all of that space, one could certainly have hoped for a better result, a worthwhile 'comeback'. Granted, there was no intention of ever releasing this to the public originally, and when it did finally rear its head it was through a tiny independent imprint, at the behest of vocalist Vasillis Axioitis, who replaces Foxxe himself on these recordings. Don't expect much of a similarity to Axiotis' work with the Greek power metal troupe Phantom Lord. Sure, he's god a talent here, able to twist harsher Jon Oliva-like tones into the more mainstream gimping of many of these tracks, but it's sadly too often wasted against the hopeless writing of the vacuous riffs, powerless synthesizers and so forth.

As for Foxxe, he feels castrated here. Gone are the speed metal overtures, the raw thrashing ability and momentum of the debut album. These are all replaced with amateur hard rock riffs one could have heard from any 3rd or 4th tier band struggling to make a name for themselves on American metal radio in the late 80s. You've got the opener "Drive", which is incredibly lackluster despite the use of samples and a pretty good lead. "Breakin' Point" is practically the same track, with the notes juxtaposed slightly as to avoid self-plagiarism. Weakling synth pads betray the solo, which is strangely again quite strong. I'd even argue the lead work throughout Censored is superior to War of the Godz, with far more direction. But that's hardly a major accomplishment when the environment in which they are asserted is so meticulously average.

Not every song is so incredibly void of potential, but even at its best, in the creepy frolic of "The Lost Boys" verse, for instance, you're still getting something that could have never walked in a Whitesnake or Quiet Riot's shoes had it ever even reached the target audience. By the time you arrive at an "Too Late", "Too Much" or "Angel of Pain" it has all become a blur of sad mediocrity, and the drippy power ballad "Lullabies" borders on atrocity. The rare exception might be the closer here, a piano/vocal piece "Take Me Away" with a slight symphonic swell, that one might easily hear a Geoff Tate singing mentally, not that Axiotis does a poor job with it.

Censored is not the sort of disappointment that conjures up harrowing hatred, or the burning of the listener's flesh as he gapes with awe at how far the mighty have fallen. It was a clear notice of direction change, and the abandonment of the speed and frenzy that characterized so much of Foxxe's earlier material. Unfortunately, the songs themselves would not have been up to the task, and it reeks of poor choices. Foxxe was aware of this fact, naturally, and thus the work was released posthumously, like a fan package, but not much of a love letter. The solos are consistent enough, the vocals just a taste of Vasillis at about one quarter of his full power, and "Take Me Away" mildly moving, but the rest of the material seems like a radioactive crater of dead dreams, pounded into the blazing steppes by one of the titular godz of its predecessor.

Verdict: Fail [3.75/10]

Sister Sin - True Sound of the Underground (2010)

I'm not sure when Victory Records started moving outside of their safety zone of old school hardcore, metalcore, and pop punk to put out efforts from 'genuine' metal bands, but apparently there must be some financial fruit to the latest movement of classic metal sounds that has spread like wildfire through the younger fanbase, because they've snapped up Sister Sin's third full-length True Sound of the Underground and run with it. It would be very easy to dub the Swedish band's sound 'in trend', but they actually formed years ago and put out their debut Dance of the Wicked in 2003, which was quite some time before all these retro metal acts started sprouting up or gaining momentum and record sales.

Previously, I'd only been exposed to the 2nd album Switchblade Serenades from 2008, which wasn't all that atrocious, but not really ambitious either. Sister Sin has the distinction of a female vocalist, one Liv, who sings in a dirty, late 80s hard rock style that seems a mix of Chastain's Leather Leone and Sebastian Bach of Skid Row, so at the very least we aren't forced to sit through some harrowing Gothic metal banshee who sounds like she lost a part on Broadway. She's very easy on the eyes, and for about 90% of the image-starved people who will listen to this band that will be the sole determining factor in laying down their cash, but I was content that she's got a genuine grit and vitriol in her voice that fuses wonderfully with the tunes.

It's hard not to think of an album titled True Sound of the Underground, or songs named "Better Than Them" and "Built to Last" as pompous, but thankfully the band is offering nothing more than some mildly catchy, angry heavy metal which often hints at originality without ever truly committing. Examples include "Better Than Them", one of the few songs on the album that borders on speed/power metal, a semi-scathing indictment of Americans...with some of Liv's most pissed vocals and a nice, piercing chorus line, gang shouts, and a nice little sample and orchestral tease during the bridge. "24-7" sounds like something Lemmy might have written while he was out on the Strip shopping for whores, and "The Devil I Know" has an undercurrent of filthy German heavy metal like Accept.

Not all that glitters is gold, however, and no amount of guyliner and tattoo font band logo can conceal the few mediocrities that creep up on this record, like the bluesy and boring ass rock & roll of "Built to Last" which finally rewards us with a half-decent chorus. A lot of Liv's more nasally, upper-range choruses can grow repetitive, and the band goes all in for the big Skid Row chorus part on like half the songs here, without them every eking their way deeply into your memory. Still, there are quite a few quality songs you can rage and sing along to, including the title track "Sound of the Underground", the aggressive "Nailbiter" and the closer "Beat Em Down", and the production of the record is quite up to snuff, primed to blast out of whatever speakers that serve as your ciphers to misanthropy.

Aesthetically, it would be nice if the band lost their shitty biker print logo and a little of the 'strike a pose we are Scandinavian lookers' mentality, but this is a plague on us all, and always has been in the realm of hard rock and heavy metal music. It's high time the bands just let the rock do the talking, and worry about their modeling and (Gods willing) acting careers at a later date. The music itself is fun enough if ultimately disposable entertainment, and strangely I was often reminded of a mix of Twisted Sister and the German bands Warlock and Powerwolf, with an aggressive frontwoman. True Sound of the Underground is adequate for chewing gum for the back of your Harley and some 80s fantasy you wish to relive, and if it can bring a wealth of younger male, female and male-femme fans into the sounds of traditional metal, so be it. They don't play the most commercial of rock sounds, but I'd be damned if they aren't going to reach some level of success due to their placement in the revival wave.

Verdict: Win [7/10]

http://www.sistersin.com/

220 Volt - Lethal Illusion (1997)

Perhaps the saddest sign of hard rock and traditional metal's state in the 90s were so many of the boring ass cover arts. Meant to be iconic, they rarely involved more than the band's logo over some metallic or larval Photoshop 'texture' background, and though they intended to make some statement of solidarity or simplicity. Looking back, this was a tremendously bad idea, since a good visual aesthetic with some effort involved is always a reliable means of imbuing your work with some durability. Maybe Metallica could get away with this on The Black Album, but for all else...well, let's just say there's a good reason you won't forget Iron Maiden's cover for Powerslave, and you will need a few gigs of extra memory to recall 220 Volt's fifth album, Lethal Illusion.

But to be fair, this was an album recorded around 1989-1992, with material that was supposed to follow up the severely disappointing, sellout effort Eye to Eye. So immediately, this album is out of place for a 1997 release, and unfortunately, for those hoping it is some return to form of the first three records, it continues directly where Eye to Eye left off. Bluesy, generic hard rock which is meant for mass appeal and radio spots rather than raging, banging heads at a live gig. That being said, I will argue that Lethal Illusion is a better record than its predecessor, because as lame as it would be that 220 Volt could not grasp what made them special in the first place, they have done a far better job of writing the songs here.

Obviously, the songs that verge on more metallic elements, even if they be in the simple melodies and chords of the guitars and feel no heavier than Great White, are my favorites here. I was not offended by "Big Business", "Disappointed" or "Lethal Illusion" itself, which are all metal lite though the flowing backup vocals and bluesy mesh similar to Kingdom Come (a band I happen to enjoy greatly) with less impressive singing. "Shotgun Sally" is basically a pure NWOBHM song, or at least could be considered so if it had come from the throat of Biff Byford and Saxon. "Don't You believe Me" is like a more reserved Skid Row, and "The Great Escape" is a slow, atmospheric ballad that picks into some tasty, driving metal which is probably my favorite on the entire record. On the flip side, there are songs like "Before You Go" which feels like a pseudo-cover of Tom Petty's "Won't Back Down" gone hard rock, or the Extreme-like boogie rock of "Chicago" which basically sucks.

I hope this record made someone money somewhere, or appealed to the small handful of fans that might have adored Eye to Eye if they were suitably lacking in good taste, because there's not much else to justify its existence. 220 Volt's metal years remain their best, and they simply were too late to benefit from the arena rock/hard rock bandwagon that died painfully as the 90s rolled on. This is a mild improvement over its '88 predecessor, and there are some moments here which are catchy and pleasing to the ear, but it would not be the disaster relief this band so obviously needed to keep their heads above water.

Verdict: Fail [4.75/10]

http://www.220volt.se/