Thursday, December 10, 2009

The Day The Earth Stood Still (2008)

DEAR ALIEN NANITES,

Do us a favor. When you finally arrive to extinguish all traces of our species from the Earth, please, for the love of God...whatever God, from whatever planet...please, START WITH FUCKING HOLLYWOOD, including Will Smith and his offspring.

THANK YOU ALIEN NANITES.

-Autothrall

PS: Scott Derrickson, please do not rape HYPERION or PARADISE LOST like you did this classic film. Those too are beloved things written by people with taste and intelligence, for others with taste and intelligence, i.e. probably not you. Do they pick directors by lottery now? Thanks again.

Verdict: Epic Fail [1/10] (1 point for Keanu, who against all odds, is the only part of this film that did not completely suck... put that in your pipe and smoke it)

4 comments:

is this your life? said...

I'm liking these. Also, hold your breath for Oldboy Smith.

autothrall said...

Remember kids:

Pollution and violence are BAD.

Military is totally EVIL.

Genocide of 99.9999999999999999999% of the lifeforms on a planet is ACCEPTABLE.

RobinD said...

Funny you should mention it, I was on wikipedia the other day and learned the Oldboy remake was dead in the water, score one for litigation.

is this your life? said...

Really? I thought they were just using the comics instead of the movie. That's awesome!