Motörhead - Orgasmatron (1986)

In a year which produced such albums as Master of Puppets and Reign of Blood which were carrying metal music into its bold and aggressive future, the 7th studio album from legends Motörhead served as a beloved contrast, a study in the rock and roll fury of the medium's past. From its iconic hellish train cover image, Barbarella inspired title to the steady distorted thrum of Lemmy's bass, it's yet another of the band's myriad classics.

"Deaf Forever" makes for a nice lead-in with its steady rocking rhythm, dominating bass and shouting samples. The lyrics are also pretty serious business here as evident in the chorus:

Sword and shield
Bone and steel
Rictus grin
Deaf forever to the battles din

"Nothing Up My Sleeve" follows the "Ace of Spades" format of fast and fun, shuffling blues metal with big chords below Lemmy's blue collar poetics. "Ain't My Crime" rocks the hell out, with a noisy guitar strumming above its chords. "Claw" is lowdown, dirty and mean and sexy. He just don't understand the power of the claw! "Mean Machine" is perfect Motörhead, raw and powerful metal blues performed like no other band. One of the best tracks on the album. "Built for Speed" is a mid-paced tribute to the rock and roll lifestyle. "Ridin' With the Driver" delivers a punk edge and "Doctor Rock" is a corny classic:

I've got the medicine you need
I've got the power, I've got the speed
I'll find out how to stop your clock
We sure ain't talking Doctor Spock
Hear me talking, Doctor Rock

This is the same song in which Lemmy tells some lucky female inspiration she's got a body like a Marshall Stack. Grrowwrr! The title track "Orgasmatron" ends the album with its very simple rhythm and some of Lemmy's most gnarled and brutal vocals ever, despite the lack of many notes in the riffs it's almost hypnotic and another of the band's classics.

The entire album is slathered in a rotten, dirty production. You feel like you've just strolled into a bar in HELL and Motörhead is the house band. Expect some fightin' and at least one bottle broken over your head. Also expect not to be my friend if you don't like this, poseur!

Verdict: Epic Win [9/10] (for I am Mars, the god of war, and I will cut you down)

http://www.imotorhead.com/

Motörhead - Motörizer (2008)

Does a Motörhead album even require a review anymore? Isn't this a band above and beyond the criticism of mortals? I mean, this is a band whose legacy is just as reliable as any religion on earth. Maybe for some this band IS a religion. The religion of REAL heavy fucking metal, without any regard for trends or any sort of acceptance. The band does what it does, and survives entirely on the merits of that. Motörizer is no exception to the rule. No exception to their rule. The Iron Fist is 20 studio albums deep with this, and there is no sign of slowing or pissing off.

Thank fuck.

Lemmy and crew lay down the dirty from the very opening grit of the "Runaround Man". Then, in true tradition, you get the mid-paced, total fucking rock out "Teach You How to Sing the Blues" that makes beer bottles go flying through the air to smash into the nearest hard surface, whether that's a street, a wall, or a person's head. It's all fair in love and war.

Can you still get it up,
Or are we pusing too hard,
If you wanna get your hands on a beautiful girl,
You gotta use a Mastercard.

I mean, seriously, that's awesome. These guys aren't fools, they've seen a lot over the years. They are old men, and they know it. It doesn't stop the "Rock Out", with its "Ace of Spades" vibe. The bad ass blues of "One Short Life". Or the total kick ass "English Rose".

The first time it was amazing,
But the next time's gonna be hell,
I know your Momma thinks you're a sweet young thing,
But she don't know you too well.

Ladies and bangers, money can still buy you happiness, and that usually comes in the form of a Motörhead record. Don't miss out.

Verdict: Win [8/10] (nobody is innocent)

http://www.imotorhead.com/