One Man Army and the Undead Quartet - The Dark Epic... (2011)

Had anyone asked me if I would have missed One Man Army and the Undead Quartet if they disbanded after dropping from Nuclear Blast, I would have answered with indifference, but once Johan Lindstrand and company stopped farting around and got down to business with their Massacre Records releases, we were seeing a fairly strong contender for that 'vacant' Swedish death/thrash throne that bands like Carnal Forge never quite mounted, Darkane kept sitting on and then promptly absconding, and The Haunted never deserved, because let's face it, they eventually started to suck even worse than anyone could have ever imagined. The Dark Epic... isn't exactly a masterpiece, or even a great album in the end, but as the One Man Army swan song it suffices, a balance of hooks and aggression which faithfully carry the torch for Grim Tales while changing a few of the rules. Though the band had already become less active by the time of its release, with Johan about to return to The Crown, this certainly doesn't sound like phoned in contractual filler, though it's not quite good enough that you feel the three years were spent honing it to perfection...a first, since they earlier fired off three full lengths in three years.

This was the one album from the band I admit to having had little knowledge of, being so busy listening to and reviewing metal records in 2011 that it must simply have passed me by; so I apologize for the mild delay in covering it. Nonetheless, The Dark Epic... is interesting immediately because of the change in art style gracing its cover. A scythe-wielding, Solomon Kane-like figure surrounded by crows with the band's logo imposed over him seems almost a kitschy, comic book/horror presentation, created by none other than Björn Gooßes, front man for the German band Night in Gales. Beyond that, the album has a more blunt and straightforward production that lacks a fraction of the gloss of its predecessor, but compensates with a little more punch to the rhythm guitars (like the first album), thick bass lines and another intense performance from Marek Dobrowolski; who I'm surprised hasn't been picked up by some major European band, since he's one of those 'total package' drummers with great, snappy snare tones, plenty of solid fills and capable footwork whenever required. As far as the songwriting goes, I found this was actually a little more diverse than Grim Tales, not that it's ultimately superior (it's not), but they cast a broader net and pulled back a wider selection of riffing patterns and tempos which help pace out the 48 minutes (their longest record since the debut, if I'm not mistaken).

Granted, few of the riffs themselves are truly inspirational or unique, what with 25 years of thrash, death and eventually admixtures of the two behind them, but no question they're busy enough and imbued with enough melodies to satiate the modern melodic death metal fan who has followed that scene since At the Gates, Dark Tranquillity, Carcass and others pioneered it in the earlier 90s. It certainly wouldn't have been out of place to hear these rhythm guitar progressions on a record like Slaughter of the Soul, Heartwork or The Haunted Made Me Do It, but that's not to accuse them of painful familiarity. Solid, dense palm muting and intensity dispersed at a measured clip, and the lead sequences here are among the most developed in the band's discography. The titular "Dark Epic" uses some acoustic guitars to set up a slower, steadier, and more dynamic, melodic sequence than much of the album, adding to the well-rounded impressions it leaves. Johan Lindstrand seems pretty confident here, as well, not so explosive as he might have been on a few of those Crown records, but at least he's not wasting half the album experimenting with cleans; he focuses in on his harsh, semi-emotional barking vocals which snuggle him safely between the raspier Carcass timbre of Tomas Lindberg and the less pronounced Tony Kampner (ex-Witchery).

This is definitely a record for fans of Swedish bands like Carnal Forge, In Thy Dreams and 21st century efforts from The Crown, so don't expect a lot of 80s personality in the thrash elements. It's meatier and marginally more brutal, and like its predecessor Grim Tales the lyrics take a pretty interesting tour through classic horror concepts. Well-written and meaningful rather than just gory. I think ultimately this is the disc I would have liked 21st Century Killing Machine to have been, a debut which I found as piercing and effective as particles of sunlight on a rainy, overcast day; it bears a pretty close resemblance to that in sound, but the riffs are more driven, stylized and entertaining like the third album, the only one it doesn't meet or surpass in quality. The Dark Epic... has nothing on other albums from this region in 2011, like Morbus Chron's Sleepers in the Rift, which was rewriting the script for death metal nostalgia, or Antichrist's Forbidden World, a deathlike thrashing which was so fucking phenomenal that it was like having Hell ejaculate into your ears, but to their credit, One Man Army and the Undead Quartet had a closing chapter they could at least feel content with. Nothing special, but well ahead of where they were four years earlier.

Verdict: Win [7.25/10] (stitch me the fuck together)

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One Man Army and the Undead Quartet - Grim Tales (2008)

After their Nuclear Blast deal came to a close, One Man Army and the Undead Quartet were thrown another strong opportunity, to join the Massacre Records family. Thus, they still had the potential to make a name for themselves, even if the first two records didn't really pay off in anything more than a faintly audible level of buzz. Grim Tales is a better produced, better written record than either of its predecessors, and the first that I can claim to have 'liked', so naturally it wasn't incredibly well received at large and further sunk the Swedes into near obscurity (even though a few of the members could always run back to their other, better known bands like The Crown). This isn't exactly unique stuff, and it's possibly the most straightforward of their records, lacking the charm and variation of the sophomore, but it firmly wedges a skull-adorned boot and greave up your arse and then leaves it planted there for 46 minutes.

Duration was an issue with the first album (an hour of mediocrity is an hour too much in my estimation), but then they tightened that down for Error in Evolution to about 40 minutes, which paired with the newfound enthusiasm in the writing, proved the stronger of the two. To its great credit, while longer than the second album, Grim Tales fills itself out well enough that you don't really notice. Classic West Coast 80s thrash triplets and charge rhythms dominate the battlefield, with noticeable nods to Metallica or Testament in not only the pacing and construction of the guitars, but in how some of the burning, bluesy lead flashes remind us of what Kirk Hammett might have snatched from his creative ether during his prime. In other places, you get a lot of perky, squealing Zakk Wylde techniques built into the rhythm guitars which recall an album like No Rest for the Wicked, or perhaps more directly Alexi Laiho's playing (which is itself obviously built upon Wylde and Rhoads). Good use of melodic chords, vibrant energy and the truly level production of the guitar, which dominates without drowning out the rhythm section, ensure that the riffs are hits more than misses...

...and that's a first for this band. Cuts like "Misfit with a Machinegun", "A Date With Suicide", "The Frisco Reaper", "Dominator of the Flesh", and "Saint Lucifer" are genuinely catchy and engaging whether it's the riffs behind the verses or the lead snatches, and the remainder of the material isn't far behind. Beyond that, Marek Dobrowolski's playing here is fucking phenomenal, with a perfect mix emphasizing both the snares and drums but losing nothing else on the kit. Conversely, I felt like the bass guitars had less of a presence, but you can still trace them along under the rhythm guitar. As for Lindstrand, he's vastly more forceful and consistent here, rivaling even his better performances in The Crown. There is no reliance here on clean, emotional choruses which forced a mix reaction to Error in Evolution: here he's snarling and growling and some effects and layers have been placed on his voice to have it bouncing all over the belligerent guitars, which ultimately gives this record a lot of its atmosphere.

But, in the end, it's just the consistency that drives this one across the finish line. Some might rue the lack of exploration (or 'fucking around') that was tangentially present on Error in Evolution, but as much as I enjoy expansive bands that stretch out past their comfort zones, I'll take a 46 minute ass whooping any day than a failed experiment. Grim Tales isn't that distinct or creative, perhaps, with decades of thrash and death metal already supporting its existence; but it is fully self-realized. No decisions here need to be questioned by the listener; just dive in and dance in its aggression. Apart from (maybe) a few of the song titles, there is nothing remotely silly about this record. The lyrics are quite good, the best of their discography, you really feel the sickness and psychosis in a tune like "Cursed by the Knife". It was convincing, and no longer felt like a band-just-made-up-of-guys-from-other-bands-who-just-wanna-have-fun-together under an outrageous moniker. No, Grim Tales was something to be reckoned with, and while it's far from mandatory, it's an easy recommendation for fans of Carnal Forge, Witchery, Terror 2000 and the first few albums by The Haunted.

Verdict: Win [7.75/10] (the spit and the piss)

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One Man Army and the Undead Quartet - Error in Evolution (2007)

While Error in Evolution develops a set of problems all its own (hell, the title even implies such), and I was hesitant to even check this out after so mild a reaction to the debut album, One Man Army and the Undead Quartet at least came off to me as entertaining here. As meek and primitive as some of the techniques were, and despite an obvious intention to implement cleaner, emotional vocals (which were sparse on 21st Century Killing Machine), there's an appreciable integration of melody into the chugging rhythm guitars. Most importantly, a few of the chorus sequences on this album actually stand out, whereas last time the best you'd get was some growling over a boring riff that was presumably supposed to be the most intense in that given song...

I think it's clear that a bit of Swedish melodeath influence crept in here in both the muscular momentum of the more traditional picking patterns, not to mention the dime a dozen melodies that break out in tunes like "Heaven Knows No Pain" or "Knights in Satan's Service" (an offhanded KISS tribute?!?) which you could find on any random clone of Dark Tranquillity or early In Flames. There's also a lot more jubilation in the lyrical/vocal construction and the pacing, which seems to be faster than the debut without going to extremes. A track like "The Supreme Butcher" almost seems like post-Exodus party thrash, where "Mine for the Taking" goes straight for the chorus and a great bridge. Much of the punctuality in the riffing reminds me of Children of Bodom, only without the ceaseless added level of noodling leads and synthesizers (if that makes sense). Lindstrand is definitely trying to stretch his pipes with some whinier clean vocals, developing a charisma somewhere between Anders Fridén's modern vulnerability and Alexi Laiho's rapaciousness, and then supporting this with his own blunt guttural force.

The peppiness of the drumming and pump of the bass from the first album both return here, but this time out I definitely felt a greater punch to the stomach when listening to the constant chugging, which helped ramp up my own enthusiasm. Rhythm guitar riffs are still largely bland and derivative, but the small choices being made in there are more pleasing to the ear, and they actually load up some slightly technical fills in tunes like "The Sun Never Shines". A few of the 'jump da fuc up' style progressions can seem distracting, but they actually conjure some interesting things with them where they integrate them in "See Them Burn" against the multiple vocal styles and the slower paced melodies. One track, the straight up metal anthem "He's Back (The Man Behind the Mask)", seems like it was meant to retroactively score some long forgotten 80s slasher gem, but the accented chorus melody might prove too cheesy to stomach for a number of listeners who just fucking hate everything Swedish post-Somberlain anyway. It IS an Alice Cooper cover, in their defense.

No doubt Error in Evolution would prove groan-inducing to that same crowd, and some fans of the debut might also not have appreciated its playfulness, since the band seems not to take itself so seriously. There's also no doubt that One Man Army and the Undead Quartet were aiming at a more pedestrian, everyman spin on the melodic death/thrash niche (comparable with The Haunted, or a clowny late 90s In Flames), while peers like Darkane were taking it into a more interesting, technical and dystopian direction. Naturally, the latter was more my style, but I walked out of this record with at least a fraction of amusement, while I can't remember even cracking a smile at 21st Century Killing Machine. Goofy, crowd pleasing, and self-consciously idiotic in places, Error in Evolution is not exactly a 'good' album, but it taught me that Lindstrand's new vehicle might have been capable of writing one.

Verdict: Indifference [6.5/10] (I am aging against the wind)

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One Man Army and the Undead Quartet - Christmas for the Lobotomizer (2006)

Christmas for the Lobotomizer was a limited run single released on Nuclear Blast late in 2006, presumably to bridge the gap between the Swedes' first two records for a small number of devoted fans, and keep the band on an upwards momentum into their sophomore album Error in Evolution. Had the band actually gotten somewhere, without the primary constituents eventually returning to their former groups (like The Crown and Grief of Emerald), this might have proven somewhat of a collector's item. Hell, it might anyway, but not based upon the quality of the material within, that much I can promise.

I'll be honest: I was half expecting some dorky "Jingle Bells" medley or reindeer samples, but the titular "Christmas..." is actually a straight up thrasher in line with the material on 21st Century Killing Machine, only the power of the guitar seems marginally less compact and brutal. The riffs actually aren't all that bad, easily the equal of most of the debut in durability, but at the same time neither are they (or the lead) easy to retain in the memory. Standard, uninspired modern thrash with growled vocals, plenty of bounce and thrust, but nothing even remotely compelling ever happening. Granted, there has been a dearth of 'quality' Christmas material in the metal; King Diamond obviously cleans up this category, but I can also remember a handful of others like Mental Home's "Christmas Mercy". However, in this case, the bareboned writing doesn't lend itself whatsoever to the holiday atmosphere it hints at...too bad.

The rest of the single is fleshed out by a trio of live performances from the 2006 Summer Breeze Open Air festival in Germany. Johan works up the crowd predictably, weaving in some cleaner shouts to the growls. The sound mix is far more visceral and raw than what you'd hear on the album, and in a way I actually think it lends the tunes more character, but obviously the riffs are no stronger here than they were on 21st Century Killing Machine, so I wasn't able to derive much enjoyment from this. Entirely forgettable and unnecessary.  But hey, if you're one of the few and proud One Man Army... fans, and never got to catch them on a European gig, this is probably the one place you have left to turn beyond YouTube to experience their live sound. Assuming you can find a copy, but I doubt there would be much competition when the CD turns up on an auction site.

Verdict: Fail [3.5/10]

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One Man Army and the Undead Quartet - 21st Century Killing Machine (2006)

One Man Army and the Undead Quartet was a Swedish band which kept a relatively low profile despite their numerous advantages. A band moniker that really stuck out from the crowd, superb Anthony Clarkson artwork which many bands would kill for, and a Nuclear Blast signing for their first two records. On top of that, even though they were not strictly a thrash band, they emerged at a time when the niche was starting to pick up steam again, and actually released all their albums through that very period. These weren't new kids on the block either, having cut their teeth in acts like Grief of Emerald, Incapacity, and most notably, the front man Johan Lindstrad was a member of The Crown when they first started to blow up internationally in the late 90s. So, with all that going for them, why is it that 21st Century Killing Machine failed to make much of an impression?

I can't speak for Europe, where the band obviously had a live presence with some festivals and touring, but they received nary a whisper in my own neck of the woods. This was one of those albums I picked up on impulse because I was surprised that they had a release out on one of the bigger metal labels, realizing only later that it was Johan's new band. Unfortunately, he seems to have traded down here, because if there is one thing lacking from 21st Century Killing Machine, it's the incendiary energy with which his alma mater lit up the studio on the records Hell is Here and Deathrace King. The Crown is a safe comparison for One Man Army, along with Witchery, though the focus here is almost entirely on mid-paced rhythms and the establishment of professional production values rather than explosive, memorable death/thrash anthems, and ultimately that is this debut's undoing. I don't know about you, but I have little interest in wasting an hour on plodding, average riff progressions that go next to nowhere. The album is far too long (just under 60 min. with the bonus tracks), and there's very little music of interest, thus even less replay value...

It would take me less than the fingers on one hand to count the number of times the rhythm guitars actually caught my attention here, and even then it was usually at the beginning of a track like "Killing Machine" or "Hell is For Heroes" where the moderate thrashing pace was solid enough to generate some interest in what was about to follow. But there is never any payoff: the choruses are lackluster, the tension and building of the various rhythms bland and uninspired, the melodies faint and few between, the handful of simplistic leads not able to compensate. Lindstrad's vocals were never among my favorite in the Swedish scene of the 90s, but here he manages little more than a stock, gravelly growl permeated by a few whispered emotional segments, and especially in the choruses the guy fails to evoke any excitement whatsoever. The riffs are dense, thuggish and have an appreciable level of punch to them, but with only the scant exceptions I hinted at above, they all play out in predictable and unimaginative patterns, at best picking up to a rapid mid speed, but occasionally lapsing into tired groove/thrash metal tropes somewhere between Pantera and Helmet in context.

The rhythm section is admittedly quite good here, with a potent and loud bass presence and some crack drumming that remains consistent at any speeds. For instance, the rampant double bass work on "When Hatred Comes to Life" is pretty tight near the bridge. The snare and toms are poppy and clean, but they really slice through those fat bass guitars and create a concussive backdrop to the compositions. The fault lies solely in the guitars' inability to create rhythm licks or specific leads over them, with second rate riffs often just paraphrased from bands like Exodus. Beyond that, the lyrics, which you'd think might take on a more ghastly horror aesthetic, seem like more of the same sacrilegious throwdowns that defined Johan's years in The Crown. You get the self-referential, pseudo-conceptual hints of zombies and terror, but it's never interesting, and ultimately 21st Century Killing Machine comes across as a hollow experience with high production values, that might have been so much more if One Man Army and the Undead Quartet were stronger songwriters. This is all merely moderate action to which you might bang your head if you had nothing better to do, but this first selection of tunes is too easily forgotten and returned to the CD rack, right between Exodus' offensively average Exhibit duology and Onslaught's post-reunion material.

Verdict: Indifference [5.5/10] (rise of a monster catastrophe)

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