Speaking of soulless post-rock, why don't we take a gander at We're From Japan. Another offering in a line of uninspired neonates crawling out of the Explosions womb, Now Breathe offers up seven exercises in stale swell-and-break monotony. You'll never be able to guess how the songs go - a bit of a mellow section to be all nostalgic, adding in little bits, getting louder and louder until BAM out of nowhere the heavy strumming and post-hardcore knockoff drums kick in for epic climax adventures in rollercoaster town. Some parts strive for more of a traditional rock jam feel, reminiscent of recent math rock but lacking any sort of interest or progression. It all has a nice, polished, pleasant tone, but the combination of me-too sterility and utterly unimaginitive songs make this nothing more than a bad blowjob. Not a teeth-scraping, skin-ripping suckoff, but the kind where you can barely feel anything and feel bad for the cutie down there. I mean, they're trying, right? It would almost be adorable if it wasn't a waste of your time.
Verdict: Fail [2/5] (5 dollars is too much)